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Reframing shifts the focus from the presenting problem to the deeper issue of relationships.Why is this shift important?
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Focus on relationships takes us to the story of the soul, which is where we want to get to. If we stay with the presenting problem, we will be more tempted to analyze and help instead of being curious, and stirring up an appetite for God.
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Trauma and our responses to it are often formed by relationships (how did others around us model responses to trauma? How did they cause us hurt?) Presenting problems are merely the “tip of the iceberg” and driven by the emotions generated by the internal world of the person and their relationships. Addressing the problem may temporarily blunt the consequences of a particular incident, but will not be able to change the core of the relationships, which may result in insecurity, anger, loneliness, etc. Getting at the internal world will shift a person toward vulnerability instead of trying to make themselves “look” better in their surface-level behavior, and confront the statements that control and drive their relationships.
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Our reactions to things are a learned habit from our growing up. If we are not aware of that as we get older and make necessary changes, we are still reacting from our initial response that our brain takes us to from years ago. There are always reasons why we react the way we do – past hurts, the way we were treated or even neglected growing up. The root problem when it is acknowledged will never be changed, but it can be redeemed by Christ as we move towards Him in the process. Reframing is going to help us get to where we need to do our best healing in the situation and allowing God to carry our burdens.
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We have momentary problems and frustrations; but our reactions to those things stem from something much deeper. Whether that is because we are prideful, or self-centered, or we have been hurt and we are trying to protect ourselves– the immediate problem only tells a bit of the entire story. As we look at our relationships, it helps us to understand our most important relationship, and we can (in time) turn our eyes to our creator and the one who redeems us, even with all of the hurts and frustrations in this life.
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The shift is so important because it helps take the person on a journey with you to see the true inner being of themselves. It helps them travel through the course of their emotional, physical and spiritual life. It allows them to get a better vision of theirself as they connect with others, issues, situations. Once they have begun this journey at each stage to understand and see more. They become eager to explore even further. This begins to give them a desire to want to know more. Thusly, guiding them to want a deeper relationship with God. Each step gets them closer and deeper to where they need to be.
