• Discussion Questions

  Many people assume that learning the theory and skills of SoulCare is all that is needed to become an effective counselor. Dr. Crabb begins with a very different assumption, that discerning the passions that rule within you as a SoulCarer is essential. What do you perceive to be the dangers of ignoring this assumption? Illustrate your reasoning with examples from your own life or create a scenario that illustrates it.

  Deleted User replied 3 years, 5 months ago 25 Members · 26 Replies

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  Deleted User

  Deleted User

  12/16/2021 at 20:08

  I think the more aware I am of my own internal mess, the more inadequate I feel, and thus recognize my dependence on God’s provisions. Being aware of my motives while relating with others, keeps me checking in with God about how to proceed and what to say and what to leave unsaid. Acknowledging annoyance and frustration with the individual I am with frees me to be honest about what I am feeling, but by God’s grace speak in kind meaningful ways that invite another to taste God.

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  Deleted User

  Deleted User

  11/09/2021 at 17:43

  If we ignore what is going on inside of us, we will quickly be going to our own thoughts and strength to deal with the other person. We will look directly at them, and quench the work of the Spirit. He can move and speak through us, but if we are not taking a look at our judgments or our frustrations or our insecurities, we will be unintentionally trying to overcome those things instead of dealing with the person. If we can look at ourselves first, and deal with those issues between ourselves and the Lord, and also grow more as we encounter those challenges, then we will be more able to allow the Spirit to move through us in order to create deep and meaningful relationships and conversations.

  I’ve often approached peoples’ problems or concerns with my own “knowledge”; but once I took a look at myself, it was a deep-rooted sense of pride. As I began to see myself and my own heart as others would come to me, I was able to grow more in my Spiritual walk. As I did that, I have become increasingly more able to provide soul care to others, in a way that creates a real connection from my raw and soft heart to theirs.

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  Deleted User

  Deleted User

  09/15/2021 at 15:23

  This concept from Dr. Crabb is counterintuitive to most of us. If I know tips and techniques for administering Soul Care and think that I am offering them with skill and care, I am not. If I am leaning on my ‘own understanding’ while thinking I am being effective, I am quenching the Holy Spirit to do His job. I am also grateful to encounter this view of the role of the Holy Spirit. I recently heard a video message from Larry regarding his coming to understand the role and engagement he can and did enjoy with the Spirit in a way that I wanted to understand. These lessons are giving me a picture of this more clearly.
  I will forever remember a counselee who wanted to share an ugly secret with me about his sexual sin outside of his marriage. While he is telling me his story, I was feeling violated and dirty. I truly wanted to take a bath so to speak while hearing this man’s story. This was a clear picture, among many from my own experiences, of how I was sensing an accusation of this man in my eyes as he needed me to listen and know that I had no ability to do what I was there to do. This entire process is counterintuitive and at the point when I think that I understand it – I take a second look and I know it has eluded me again.

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  Deleted User

  Deleted User

  09/06/2021 at 07:49

  When a counselor do not know why he/she responds in a certain manner to someone’s sharing, he will end up merely dispensing a quick fix to prove his/her adequacy. If one is unware of one’s own passions, how is one able to help another truthfully to handle his/her passions? We short-changed ourselves in allowing the Spirit of God to minister through us, into the other person’s life.

  There was a lady who came for help frequently. Many of my colleagues knew and seen her. It was my first encounter, and having listened to her, I felt she wanted to live a more meaningful life, and to be accepted. In trying to help her connect, I realized that at the mention of her name, “everyone” ran off. How could this be? It was painful. I understand that she would ring people at the most unearthly hour. What should I do? I don’t want to give her my number. I reasoned within myself that she didn’t choose to be born with this medical condition. She, too is made in the image of God. How can we show acceptance of who she is, without causing further hurt.
  I have confessed to her my inadequacies and my fear. I decided to be honest with her – and let her know why is ‘people afraid of her, and why I can’t give her my number? At that point, it is as if a light came to her face – she teared and said, “Why did no one tell me honestly all these while?” She broke into a beaming smile. She was ready to live her life – and ceased trying to hard to win the acceptance of others through the many ways she has employed. I have learnt, “We needn’t be perfect living in an imperfect world.”

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  Deleted User

  Deleted User

  08/13/2021 at 23:28

  As a friend of mine were in company together and we discussed a topic in which we both took a part of more like forced into it not of our choice. i felt inadquate not knowing what level or to what degree
  my friend experience was incurred. but I told her what happened to me . Then she opened open broke down and told me hers as painful as it was. we as teenagers were forced into a abortion. Something
  we kept hidden within ourselves and told no one. Not knowing my speaking to her about what happen to me, was what she needed to get her healing and break through was what she really needed.
  just because I opened up didn’t mean she would. but God used this opportunity to help her. I suggested going to a retreat and she agreed. that weekend she opened up and let it out and she is healed today. who would know and this is where God has called me to minister to the hurting. My Apostle after hearing my childhood said God wants me into Pastoring little did I know I was already taken the course. Not pastoring over a church but in a church, we ourselves are inadequate but with Jesus all things are possible through Christ which strengthen Us. Our dangers are thinking we have it all together and not looking at the mess inside ourselves. we are still a mess too. we must seek God for the answers

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